Ahoy friends,
Happy Saint Patrick’s Day!
I am a little curious about today’s famous history, so I went out and interviewed a bunch of people on Granville Street (pub/bar-ville) in Vancouver. By 10:30pm the street was packed full of people. I asked a couple of them, what’s exactly goin’ on here?
Marcella: (politely asking a girl with green hair) So what’s exactly goin’ on here?
Green Haired Girl: What, you makin’ fun of me? (She does a Z-snap into the air)
Marcella: (moving away from GHG. Looking at a young man wearing a huge mad-hatter hat with a four leaf clover) So what’s exactly goin’ on here?
Mad-Hatter Head: What’s not to get? I wanna parrrrrtyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!
Marcella: (making her way across the street to talk to a girl wearing a green g-string bikini ) So what’s exactly goin’ on here?
G-String Girl: Look, don’t give me a hard time.What are you, a cop?
Marcella: (spots a couple drinking coffee from to-go mugs) So what’s exactly goin’ on here?
Coffee Couple: It’s Saint Patrick’s Day, and we are out wandering the streets to watch the LIVE entertainment.
Marcella: Oh really, there is going to be a LIVE band?
Coffee Couple: (lost in the crowd, no response)
Marcella: (walks up to a group of girls all wearing sexy green lingerie in the front of a queue) Are you ladies going to check out the LIVE band tonight?
Lingerie Girls: What LIVE band? You mean the Irish gig in the pub? (all of a sudden the girls were ushered past the red rope by the bouncer into the crowded pub)
Marcella: (thinking to herself, what do I need to do to get a few answers around here?)
*(Green Leprechaun Appears)*
Marcella: Whoa Nelly, what are you?
Leprechaun: A leprechaun. Wanna go for a green Guinness?
Marcella: Sure, if you tell me exactly what’s goin’ on around here?
Leprechaun: Well in the Irish tongue it is called Lá ’le Pádraig or Lá Fhéile Pádraig. The crowds are celebrating the patron saint of Ireland who died March 17th, 461AD.
Marcella: Where did Saint Patrick come from?
Leprechaun: Britain originally, but he was kidnapped and sent to Ireland to tend sheep. That is where he became deeply religious. A voice told him to escape back to Britain and when he got home the voice told him to go back to Ireland. After hearing all those voices, Saint Patrick was ordained a priest. His life was a struggle - trying to convert all the Irish into Christians was no easy feat.
Marcella: Why is everyone wearing green?
Leprechaun: To show their commitment to Ireland. It’s called “the wearing of the green.” Saint Patrick used a green shamrock (three leaf clover) to explain the Holy Trinity to the pre-Christian Irish. Now during modern times the colour green symbolizes Catholic-Irish nationalism.
Marcella: So, why is that guy over there wearing all orange?
Leprechaum: He is a Protestant. The colour orange was a mark of defiance towards the Catholic majority in Ireland, started by William of Orange.
Marcella: Imagine growing up with a name like that! I would have called him Willy of O! So, if Saint Patrick was such a devout Christian, why are all these people drinking so much beer?
Leprechaun: Not just any beer, but the famous Irish stout - Guinness! When Irish immigrants arrived in North America, Australia, New Zealand, Uruguay and the Caribbean they brought with them some customs from home; one being their drink.
Marcella: How much Guinness do the Irish drink, exactly?
Leprechaun: Each day 5.5 million pints of “mother’s milk” is consumed around the world. However, on Saint Patty’s Day we’re looking at 13 million pints.
*(Before Marcella can thank the Leprechaun for all his valuable information, he disappears…not into oblivion or anything magical like that, but to head to the loo after drinking so much beer.)*
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